Lost

I have loved only two people in my life, one is B and the other is you.

And with that, I lost both of you.

I try to imagine what I could have done differently, maybe I shouldn't have gotten in that bus, maybe I shoul have just shut up that day, or maybe I should have just sat there a little longer. The more I think about it, the more painful it gets. To think that I might have done something, anything, to not loose you.

I'm rambling I know. I'm downing brandy today, because the ringing in my ears won't stop. Because my heartbeats are painful everytime they realize that your not in sync with my heart anymore.

I do know what needs to be done. I do know what needs to be said and heard and advised. I have the map. And yet I still feel lost.


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Today

From the tons of books I've read, from the pages of diaries I've kept, from the movies I've eagerly anticipated to the music that I excessively drank, its kindda difficult to separate true feelings to make believe. Most of the times, I look at my life like a tv series, a successful soap opera full of twists and turns that when it becomes a bit repetitive and boring, something happens. I've contemplated on my past decisions and yet still keep repeating the same mistake over and over again.
My mom and dad, when they were still together, were in my eyes, angels. After sunday church (these are the memories I can remember), we'd go to jollibee and eat. Afterwards, we'd go to Bundalian (a stationary store) to get my set of stationaries ( I used to collect them). Then we would go visit my lola who owned a shoe store and I'd eat shaved ice and coconut on the steps outside. I was happy. I think all kids can find happiness in little pleasures...
Then my parents separated and my world came crashing down.
I've always thought that if they didn't, that I would be a totally different person today. I'd be more sophisticated, I wouldve kept my old friends, I probably would have been married by now, with kids, a life totally different from what I have today...
(To be continued-- too sad today)
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Thinking

Can't sleep. Again.

I stared at my white ceiling with its circular shaped luminaires, the brushed stainless steel edging faintly glowing with the lamp I have on while I was reading Audrey Niffenegger's Her Fearful Symmetry. Cluthing Osso Bear and Dugong (my stuffed bear and seal) by my side, I feel almost safe and at ease. Everything that I have either in my bed (newly changed sheets; zebra-printed wool blanket on top of my chocolate colored covered mattress, 4 white pillows, 3 brown ones, a very cozy black comforter and my stuffed animals) or me, whose hair is still damp from the lovely bath I had, all should contribute to my moment of rest. I even have an Amuin linen spray in Lavander to help me ease into a state of dreaminess (as the lady in Beauty Bay said) but to no avail. Couldn't help it thoughN after this point, there's only so much a person could do so that she can sleep.

Probably owing to the tiring deal of wanting to sleep a little early today (its 12.35am here in Dubai) is the fact that I've been stressed and pissed off today. I had a "trailing-mail fight" with one of my seniors, who, in fact, just sent me a lousy e-mail at 10.33pm today (last night, technically).

As I continue to stare, my mind wanted to feel more irritated so I started to ponder on flashbacks. What happened to my life? What mistakes did I do?

And then, it suddenly hit me. I'm already feeling shitty, and instead of dwelling on my regrets, why not make the most of my blessings. Sure, I've had a very unusually tiring day, but that doesn't mean ill have a bad day again tom. Its up to me really, to just finish what I start and move on to the next phase. isn't this life as we know it?

Thank God I'm sleepy now.

Journals really help.

Ciao bello!
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Test Shot

Hala naloko na! Nawili.

Test post with image.


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Today

I promised myself nuon pa na I'd blog regularly... I'm the type of person who has soooo much on her mind at hindi mapakali. Sometimes I get these thoughts as fluid as water and I want to retain them, kaso I am so tamad writing. Thank God I have a new device, to which I am greatful, kasi anytime I can just chatter away in this small private world that I call my own, na kahit ano isulat ko okay lang. Its mine, and in truth, this is my heart.

A lot happened today, but no use in dwelling in the past when I'm not wallowing in my sea of self-pity today. For now, I'm just lying down on bed, nakabungisngis kasi I can type my thoughts sa new Blackberry8900. Saya ko lang talaga.

Worth the investment.

ciao bello!
Mhykie
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Testing blackberry to blogger so that I can update my blog regularly
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Sometimes

Dear You,

Hindi ko kasi maintindihan, takot ako. Pinagdaanan ko na lahat ito dati at sinumpa ko na hinding hindi na mangyayari ulit sa akin ito. Although alam ko na ganun ang sitwasyon nya, bukas mata kong pinasok, knowing eventually na maghihiwalay rin kasi. It was the happiest 2 years of my life, simple lang pero napakasaya.

Ako ang nakipaghiwalay, kasi dadating na girlfriend nya. Yung mga araw na yun, leading up to that day, halos hindi namin bitawan ang isat-isa. Lahat ng mga "kunwaring pangarap" namin naglalaho na isa isa. Dumating din ang araw na yun, and as i watched him pick up his last bag and walk down the stairs through the door, nanlambot ako, ni hindi ko nagawang tawagin siya ulit at yakapin for the last time.

Sabi ko sa sarili ko, sige, life goes on.... so after mawala sa ulirat ng isang taon, i started to rebuild my life again. Keeping his memory, our memories in my heart. Everyday they sustain me, at nung nagkaboyfriend ulit ako, alam nya (ung bagong bf) kung gaano ko kamahal (ung ex ko).

Nag tyaga naman siya sa akin, eventually, naging masiyahin ulit ako. Kaso there was always something missing in us. Yung "passion", yung "kilig", yung feeling na sobra kang excited na makita siya. Our conversations were down to formalities, he doesn't even know half of what you know. Hindi nya naririnig ang frustrations, and desires, ang longing at joy. I guess, kasalanan ko na rin yun. Kasi matagal na itong hang-over ko dun sa guy who broke my heart... He really did break my heart. Or should I say I did.

Tapos, you came along. Made me aware na "huy, buhay pa pala ako!". Kasi ako naniniwala (because of my very loving and strong Mom) na you have to find your happiness. The one that makes you wake up everyday knowing na meron something special for you that God has planned. Little things, mga hi's and hello's, masarap na kape, mainit na yakap sa kaibigan... everything has a course. Yung mga bagay na hindi ko akalain na mararamdaman ko pa, naramdaman ko ulit. The giggling, the staying up late, yung mga bagay na sa akin importante. Friendship, respect, attention, care and understanding. It also helped na very in control ka sa buhay mo, lalo na sa trabaho mo. Sobrang proud ako pag dating duon.

Walang conclusion ang letter na ito. Just know na hindi ko sinasadya, hindi natin pinlano, pero hinahayaan nating mangyari. Masaya ulit ako, nagbubuo ulit ng mga pangarap. Alam ko eventually, masisira rin ang mga un. But for the time being, I can hold on to it. To make me feel whole.

Hope you will always be there to take care of me.

I need it. I need you. I want this.

xoxo

Ikaw at Ang Ako

Ganito ba talaga

Ang hirap maintindihan

Para akong nasa dagat

Lumulutang

Walang pinatutunguhan

Ngunit may pinaroroonan

Hindi ko maintindihan

ANg ninanais ng isipan

Sa sandaling sumaglit ka sa akin

Nakapako

Naloloko sa kakaisip

Laman ng damdamin ko

Naguguhong mga bato

Mabibigat, malalaki, matitibay

Ngunit pag may dumamping hangin na kinasasaklawan mo

Eto na

Gumuguho

Sa tagal ko rito

Wala na akong naramdaman

Nagmanhid na ang mga ugat sa kamay

Nangalay na ang mga paa sa kakalakad

Sa daang walang hangganan

Dumating ka

Nagbigay ng sapat na kalinga

Sa mga sugat ng mata
Sa katahimikan ng buhay

Sa ilalim ng dagat

Ngayon

Naguguluhan

Saan nga ba manantili ang tulad ko

Sa landas ng mga pinatutunguhan

O sa aking paroroonan

Published on 8/21/2007 under Places
By 2010 --the year Dubai's known oil reserves will most likely be tapped out--, prince Sheikh Mohammed Bin Rashid Al Maktoum is expecting to attract 15 million tourists. Here's how.

http://dubayy.com/attractions/mall-of-the-emirates/mall-of-the-emirates3.jpg

Ski Dubai, which is already open, is claimed to be the largest indoor ski resorts in the world, with 22,500-square metres of indoor ski area. It is a part of the Mall of the Emirates, which is one of the largest malls in the world.
An extremely efficient insulation system is the key to maintain the temperature of -1 degrees Celsius during the day and -6 degrees during the night when the snow is produced.

http://www.realestatewebmasters.com/blogs/uploads/dubai-mall.jpg

The Dubai Mall claims to be the largest mall in the world when completed. It will cover a total area of more than 12 million ft2, with 10 - 15 individual smaller malls built inside it, consisting of 9 million ft2 of shopping retail space (comprising of a total of more than 1000 stores). Featured attractions include the world's largest gold souk; the 850,000 ft2 Fashion Island; one of the world's largest aquariums; an Olympic-sized ice skating rink; Oasis Fountain Waterfall; WaterFront Atrium; a view of the (soon to be completed) world's tallest building, Burj Dubai. The mall has already won five awards. It won two awards at the Retail Future Project Awards at MAPIC, Cannes, in 2004, for Best Retail Development Scheme (Large), Best Use of Lighting in a Retail Environment. And the Dubai Mall brochure has won three awards at the Summit Creative Awards 2005, in Portland, Oregon; Gold award for Best Art Direction / Graphic Design, Silver award for Best 4-colour B2B Brochure, and Judges Special Recognition award. The mall is being built by a Joint Venture of Dutco Balfour Beatty and AGCCC for client Emaar Properties and was scheduled to be completed in 2006, claiming to be the size of 50 "international-sized football(soccer) pitches". It is now expected to be completed in 2008.

http://www.homesdubai.com/images/dubai-project-the-world.jpg

Ever wish the world was smaller? The World is a man-made archipelago of 300 islands in the shape of a world map. The World is being built primarily using sand dredged from the sea. Each island ranges from 23,000 m2 to 84,000 m2 (250,000–900,000 square feet or 5.7–21 acres) in size, with 50–100 m of water between each island. The development will cover an area of 9 km in length and 6 km in width, surrounded by an oval breakwater. The only means of transport between the islands will be by boat and helicopter. Prices for the islands will range from $15-45 million (USD). The average price for an island will be around $25 million (USD). Dredging started in 2004 and as of March of 2007 The World is around 90% complete. According to the National Geographic Channel (The Best of Megastructures) the overall price for the World is $14 Billion US Dollars.

http://simplyjessica.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/hydropolis-dubai-atnight.jpg

Hydropolis, the world's first underwater luxury resort, brings new meaning to the "ocean-view room." Situated 66 feet below the surface of the Persian Gulf, Hydropolis will feature 220 guest suites. Reinforced by concrete and steel, its Plexiglas walls and bubble-shaped dome ceilings offer sights of fish and other sea creatures. It's scheduled to open in 2009.

http://thedubailand.com/yahoo_site_admin/assets/images/dubailand-arial.356132906_std.jpg

Dubailand is to be the largest amusement park collection in the world. Twice the size of Disney World, it is expected to be a full featured city divided into six theme worlds:
Attractions & Experience World 13 km2 (5.2 mile2)
Universal Studios Dubai
Tiger Woods Dubai
Bawadi
Global Village
Kids City
Giants World
Water Parks
Aquadunya
Dubai Snowdome, an indoor ski resort.
Retail and Entertainment World 4 km2 (1.6 mile2)
Flea Market
World Trade Park
Auction World
Factory Outlets
Sports and Outdoor World 19 km2 (7.4 mile2)
Dubai Sports City
Emerat Sports World
Plantation Equestrian and Polo Club
Dubai Autodrome
Dubai Golf City
Themed Leisure and Vacation World 29 km2 (11.2 mile2)
Women's World
Destination Dubai
Desert Kingdom
Andalusian Resort and Spa
Eco-Tourism World 75 km2 (28.9 mile2)
Al Sahra Desert Resort
Sand Dune Hotel
Al Kaheel
Downtown 1.8 km2 (0.7 mile2)
Mall of Arabia, which will be the world's largest shopping mall
City Walk
The Great Dubai Wheel, which will be the world's 2nd largest observation wheel after Shanghai Kiss
Virtual Game World

Burj Dubai: world's tallest building

http://images.businessweek.com/ss/06/03/dubai/image/1burj-dubai.jpg

The Burj Dubai will be the world's tallest building when it opens in 2009. The building is part of a 2 km2 (0.8 sq mi) development called 'Downtown Dubai' and is located at the "First Interchange" along Sheikh Zayed Road at Doha Street. The building was designed by Adrian Smith before he left Skidmore, Owings and Merrill LLP (SOM) of Chicago to start his own independent practice, Adrian Smith + Gordon Gill Architecture in October 2006.[3] SOM continues to lead the architectural, structural engineering and mechanical engineering of the Burj Dubai. The total budget for the Burj Dubai project is about $4 billion US dollars and for the entire new 'Downtown Dubai', $20 billion US Dollars.

Its shape is inspired by the indigenous desert flowers that often appear as decorative patterns in Islamic architecture, but it also has an engineering purpose: The swirl shape ensures that the mass of the structure lessens as it reaches the top, making the structure steadier. A mixed-use building developed by Dubai's Emaar Properties, the Burj Dubai will house shops, offices, residences, and entertainment venues.

Palm Islands: palm-shaped man-made island

http://environmentalgeography.files.wordpress.com/2007/02/good-palm-island.jpg

The Palm Islands in Dubai are the three largest artificial islands in the world. They are being constructed by Nakheel Properties, a property developer in the United Arab Emirates, who hired the Dutch dredging and marine contractor Van Oord, one of the world's specialists in land reclamation. The islands are The Palm Jumeirah, The Palm Jebel Ali and The Palm Deira. The Islands are located off the coast of The United Arab Emirates in the Persian Gulf and will add 520 km of beaches to the city of Dubai.
The first two islands will comprise approximately 100 million cubic meters of rock and sand. Palm Deira will be composed of approximately 1 billion cubic meters of rock and sand. All materials will be quarried in the UAE. Between the three islands there will be over 100 luxury hotels, exclusive residential beach side villas and apartments, marinas, water theme parks, restaurants, shopping malls, sports facilities and health spas. The creation of The Palm Jumeirah began in June 2001. Shortly after, The Palm Jebel Ali was announced and reclamation work began. In 2004, The Palm Deira, which will be almost as large in size as Paris, was announced. Palm Jumeirah is currently open for development. Construction will be completed over the next 10-15 years.

Seven Career Killers
by Erin BurtFriday, May 1, 2009
You worked hard to get the education, the skills and now the job. Don't let these mistakes sabotage your climb up the career ladder.
Lying on your résumé, stealing office supplies or failing to show up for work will surely dampen your career prospects. But young workers need to beware of less-obvious mistakes that can sabotage their careers. Your behavior, attitude and appearance will play important roles in finding success, not only in your first job, but also throughout your entire working life.
As someone just starting out in the work world, you probably don't have a reputation yet. Take advantage of this blank slate. "You want to be seen as an up-and-comer, not the stereotypical young slacker," says Marty Nemko, a job coach in Oakland, Cal., and columnist for Kiplinger.com. Avoiding these seven career killers will help you craft a stellar reputation and keep your career on track.
1. Procrastinating. Remember the first time you put off studying for a test then crammed at the last minute and still got a decent grade? Many of us have been procrastinating since grade school and have done just fine, but that's a habit you have to break. "There's no grade inflation in the workplace," says Nemko. If you pull together a report or presentation at the last minute, your shoddy preparation is going to show. And if something unexpected happens -- say your computer crashes or a key contact fails to return a call -- the old "dog-ate-my-homework" excuse isn't going to cut it. "Procrastination is an ingrained habit," Nemko says, "but if you don't kick it pretty quick, you're going to find yourself on the corporate slow track."
2. Having a sense of entitlement. Our generation was raised on instant gratification -- we're used to getting what we want, and getting it now. Yet when it comes to our careers, no matter how hard we work, we cannot get five years' worth of experience in one year. Younger employees tend to feel entitled to quick promotions, says Randall Hansen, founder of Quintessential Careers and associate professor of marketing at Stetson University in Deland, Fla. Falling into that trap can hinder a climb up the career ladder. If you carry the attitude that you deserve to be promoted or else, you may find that "or else" is your only option, says Hansen.
If you're lucky enough to even have a job in this economy, remember that fresh out of school, you're on the bottom rung of the career ladder. That means you're going to have to pay some dues, such as taking on jobs others don't want or working days others want off. But that doesn't mean you should accept your low status forever. Learn more about how to know when it's time to move up -- and how to pull it off.
3. Settling into your job description. You may have your set responsibilities, but you should always be on the lookout for opportunities to shine. Going above and beyond your mundane entry-level tasks can demonstrate your untapped talents and show your boss you're not afraid to take initiative. Settle into your job description for too long and your reputation may be cast as a low-level lackey.
You may have to do a little self-promotion, but try not to come off as a braggart. Nemko's daughter, for example, got her first job working for Hillary Clinton -- but her job description was to answer letters to Socks, the Clintons' pet cat. Soon after starting, she approached her boss and said she was willing to pay her dues, but that she had good research and writing skills. She pointed out that she might be useful on some other task. A few days went by and her boss asked her to research a topic and write a one-page brief for Clinton. She ended up spending a year as a researcher -- that certainly beats handling feline fan mail.
4. Avoiding office politics. When it comes to playing office politics, there is naughty and nice. Naturally, you shouldn't engage in backstabbing and gossiping. But avoiding politics altogether can be deadly for your career. Like it or not, every workplace has an intricate system of power, and you can -- and should -- work it ethically to your best advantage. To get a promotion, avoid downsizing or get a project approved, you need co-worker support. Get that backing by building relationships, asking others for advice, offering your help and showing sincere interest in others, advises Nemko. (Learn more about how to make yourself fire-resistant in the workplace.)
It's also crucial to identify your workplace's hidden pockets of power. On paper, a certain person may be in charge, but you need to know who else in the office has influence so you can be sure to impress the right people.
5. Not being a team player. Getting stuck with this label is one of the fastest career killers, says Hansen. But young workers face a delicate balance. "You can't be so much a member of the team that your individual efforts are not recognized and rewarded," Hansen says. You still need to demonstrate your skills and abilities to successfully build your career without giving the appearance that you're interested only in looking out for yourself.
6. Not dressing the part. In an ideal world, you would be judged by your merits alone. However, we live in a visual society. How you present yourself can play a crucial role in the progress of your career. You want to look professional and in control, not sloppy and indifferent. Keep your hair and nails trimmed, your clothes ironed and your breath smelling nice.
As for your apparel, take your cues from what others are wearing -- you don't want to show up in a suit and tie if jeans are the norm. But it doesn't hurt to dress for the job you want, advises Nemko. It can set you apart from the rest of the crowd and subtly help higher-ups visualize you in a position of more power and responsibility. If you want people to take you more seriously and build influence, you've got to dress the part. See Dress for Success for Less for tips on pulling this off on a budget.
7. Failing to network. You've heard that networking can be a good tool to help you find a job, but maintaining your contacts after you're hired is critical to the continuing success of your career. Keeping in touch helps you stay atop the latest issues in your field and gives you people to call on when you need advice. And a contact just may help you land your next job.
When you're starting out, you probably don't know many people in your field, but there are plenty of ways you can plug into the grapevine:
Check out the resources offered by your college alumni association.
Join a professional organization or club.
Subscribe to a trade magazine.
Find online discussion groups for your industry through groups.google.com.
Keep in touch with college acquaintances in your major, especially those who may have graduated before you.
Don't be a wallflower at conferences and other functions. And always keep a business card on hand when you're outside the office. You never know when you might run into a potential contact.
Don't forget to build rapport with higher-ups in your office. You can introduce yourself at informal company socials or even while riding in the elevator. Then send them an e-mail or stop by their office to ask an occasional question or to follow up on something you chatted about previously. You never know when that friendship could come in handy down the road.
Copyrighted, Kiplinger Washington Editors, Inc.

Life after Gossip...

hmmm... what do you do when you are addicted to the

Constance Billard Choir and Queen B?

Watch like there's no tomorrow of course...

But what do I do when the season is finally coming to a close??

Will the seriously gorgeous Chuck get his balls to profess undying love to our all time fav B?

When will Ms. Lily and Mr. Rufus realize that things are always going to go bad whenever they are together, but still love will always prevail?

When will little J get her place in the MET steps?

When will lonely boy NOT be lonely again?

When will S learn that happiness lies not with a man around you BUT THE RIGHT man around you?

And when will Mr. Nate and Ms. B realize that they are NOT meant for each other?

Of course, we will have to see, till August, when they step out of their "valley life" and get into

"the real life"

For now...

I comfort myself with these fine programming from our seriously addicting American TV Series...

Oh mamma mia! Seriously, Mary Louise Parker is the envy of my eyes. Absolutely gorgeous rockin body and the genious writers who made this concept.

A suburban mom, a druggie and the weirdo son and saliva inducing older son, with the screwed up lovable uncle and hilarious neighbors.. this is a series going down in my book as one of the cutest real series ever.

Im already in Season 3...

We will see. :)

This one is my new fav... currently watching the 4th episode of season 1....

All I can say for now is \FUNNY and CLEVER.

ciao bello.

PS...

Wish it was August Already....

World's Tallest and Biggest

The World's Tallest and Biggest
By Paul Stasi

The World's Largest Man-Made Islands

Perhaps no structure on this list more embodies the original impulse behind the tall building — pure human hubris — than Dubai’s Palm Islands. Composed of three separate islands, Palm Jumeirah, Palm Jebel Ali and Palm Deira, the entire construction will add nearly 330 miles of beach front to the city of Dubai. Parts of Palm Jumeirah are currently open for development, with the remaining islands to be completed in the next 10-15 years. When finished, the three islands will contain over 100 luxury hotels while Palm Deira itself will be almost as large as Paris.

In Pictures: World’s 20 Tallest & Biggest

The World's Tallest Dam
Construction began on the Nurek Dam (984 feet) in 1961 while the central Asian nation of Tajikistan was still a republic within the Soviet Union, and was completed an efficient 19 years later. The dam provides 98 percent of Tajikistan’s electrical needs and was one of the first to be constructed with an asphalt central core of cement forming an impermeable barrier along the Vakhsh River.

The World's Tallest Hotel Not in Dubai
Though eclipsed both by Dubai’s Rose Tower and Jumeirah Emirates Tower, the Baiyoke Tower II in Bangkok, Thailand, nevertheless boasts 88 floors and 673 guest rooms. The 997-foot Tower is located in Bangkok’s Ratchathewi district known for its shopping and its 1.5 mile long artificial lake.

The World's Tallest Monument
Commonly known as the “Gateway to the West” the St. Louis Arch, designed by renowned architect Eero Saarinen, marks the starting point of the Lewis and Clark Expedition. The arch is surrounded by a 91-acre national park along the Mississippi River and stands 630-feet-tall. Visitors can take a four-minute tram ride up one of the “legs” of the arch to the observation deck at its center for spectacular views of St. Louis.

The World's Tallest Hotel Never Actually Completed
Destined for greatness, the Ryugyong Hotel in Pyongyang, North Korea, stands at 1,083 feet, was supposed to boast 105 floors and 3.9 million-square-feet of floor space, and was meant to have seven revolving restaurants. Not surprisingly this towering pyramid’s construction was put on hold in 1992 when North Korea confronted more pressing matters. What remains is the pyramid itself, but it lacks windows and fixtures and has been deemed unsafe for human occupancy.

The World's Tallest Casino (sort of)
Unsurprisingly located in Las Vegas, the Stratosphere Hotel & Casino boasts a 1,149-foot-tall observation tower and restaurant, making it the tallest free-standing tower in the United States. While you can be shot straight up 160 feet in the air, or ride a mechanical arm over the Tower’s edge, there are no actual games in the tower itself.

The World's Tallest Bar
On the 87th floor of Shanghai’s Jin Mao Tower–literally “Golden Prosperity Building”–is the appropriately titled Cloud Nine. In February 2001, cocktail-sipping patrons observed Han Qizhi, a 31-year-old shoe salesman, climb the 1,214 foot tower barehanded.

The World's Largest House
Indisputably, the Sultan of Brunei’s Istana Nurul Iman is the world’s largest residence. Really more of a palace, this structure boasts an impressive 2,152,782-square-feet of space, comprised of 1,788 rooms (including 257 bathrooms), and is home to the Sultan's car collection, including 165 Rolls Royces. (It easily dwarfs Buckingham Palace's 828,818 square feet). Unfortunately for non-royals, the Sultan’s palace is only open three days a year for the Islamic festival of Hari Raya Aidilfitri, marking the end of Ramadan. However, in 2009, Indian multi-billionaire Mukesh Ambani is scheduled to complete construction on the world's largest house.

The World's Largest Ancient City
Built in the mid-15th century, Machu Picchu is located 7,875 feet above sea level in the Urubamba Valley in Peru. A gorgeous collection of 150 structures, including temples and residences, the city was abandoned approximately 100 years after its founding and not re-discovered until the early 1900s. Machu Picchu was named one of the New Seven Wonders of the World in 2007.

The World's Tallest Memorial
Erected in 1940 by the Spanish dictator Francisco Franco, the Benedictine Abbey of the Valley of the Fallen boasts the largest Memorial Cross in the world. Located 28 miles northwest of Madrid, the 492-foot structure towers above a basilica and crypt carved out of a granite ridge, and boasts spectacular views of both the surrounding valley and the outskirts of Madrid.

-----

It was a year ago I thinkWhen I first laid eyes on youIts kindda crazy to thinkThat not so much time has passedWhen I smiled back at you It was a few months back, I thinkWhen you first held my handThe warmth your touch brought into mineWas coldness seeing fireYou brought a light to my night It was a couple of weeks ago, I thinkWhen you said you wanted to leave meIt felt like drowning in a sea of saltI felt livid, sober and drunkI wish I had died It was a couple of days ago, I thinkWhen you realized we made a mistakeWe started talking again and thank GodHe was on our sideAs if we never even left It was yesterday, I thinkWhen I held my hand to your heartHearing it beating for meSeeing you only looking at meWhispering in your ear how much we careYou telling me you will always be there In my tomorrows I know nowThat our unbreakable bond is what we haveYou and me, our little piece of heavenWaking upKnowing you are in my lifeGives fuel to my otherwise diminishing fireKnowing we can make it throughThough sometimes we seem not toWe still fight and push and striveAnd come out succeeding in our lifeI want you to know honeyThat as long as God gives me a tomorrowYou will always be thereKeeping me away from sorrowKeeping me safeKeeping you safeBelievingThat we can do this.

.....

It's about time to go
It's evening and I have to catch the plane
I waited for you till it was almost dawn
Yet you were not here
You were not here

I called you 3 times on the telephone
No wonder it was switched off, I should have known
I thought we had this conversation
Wait, the kettle is boiling, I have to turn it off
Time for coffee, nerves are taking over me

I waited
To say goodbye to you
Ran my fingers across the bed
That once craddled two
I waited
To kiss you one last time
I wanted to say
I\m sorry, I really did try

....

Not one smile for me the entire day
And yet you wait for someone else, call her, smile at her.

I never treated you badly,
Now I think about it.
Not as much as you treat me.
I just believed there was a good man inside.
Just remember
In your pious ways
WHAT YOU DO TO OTHERS
WILL COME BACK TO YOU TENFOLD.




Its so hard to admit, but I was wrong.

Only one smile would have been enough
Its not only you who's having a shitty day
We are here for each other arent we?
But I suppose not.

Find happiness on your own
Neglect the people who have continually cared and loved you
Have supported you
Given you all they can.
Even if that means forsaking and postponing their own.

You are just not the man I thought you were.

Its nothing much, and will never mean anything in your life.
But I guess time will tell
When you are alone, sad and unable to bear it.
People who only truly love you
AND PEOPLE WHO YOU LET IN YOUR RIGID HEART
are the only ones who can get you
Not only family you need in your life.
You need other perspectives
And just pray that when the time comes
When you realize
Those who truly cared for you
YOU JUST SCREWED
I hope
You will not live to feel the regret of the day

Empty

This is where I stand right now.

This is where I'll be.

This is my last battlefront.

This is my last plea.

Im sorry for everything.

For not being a friend when needed be

For closing my eyes when u couldn't see

For staying behind when the future seemed bleak

For truths I was not believing

Im sorry.

In those times when you needed me and I wasn't there

In those days when you felt cold and I didn't hug you

In those moments you felt alone

In those memories that faded away

Im really sorry.

Being understanding is hard work

I did not show you not even one ounce

Being a romantic

When you needed practicality

Being considerate of you feelings

I did not even bother to

Being a pretentious bitch

When I could've put your comfort first

Im sorry. Finally.

Empty.

Drained.

Disillusioned in the rudest fashion.

Hopeless.

Please Leave

Walk out the door. Save your conscience. And I will give you a free pass forever. I will not bear grudges I promise you. All I want now is peace. All I want now is myself. Clearly, I have not had ample time for this. If you want to justify what it is that you want me to understand, don't worry, I do. I really do. And if you mean it by heart what you are saying, then leave. Please. Leave.

How to Get Over a 140-day long Crush

Ha!

I said to myself, as he continued to point out all the things that he found wrong in me. In front of his friends, and jokingly, as he always stressed (of course)-asshole!

Suddenly, I found myself smack dab in the middle of a very big dilemma. As I looked at him, I did not find him as cute as before, and did not find his jokes funny no more. What's worst is that when I see him lately, I try so hard to look for the guy I fell in love with. But no, nada, kaput, nothing! Glimpses I can see, but in this day and age, you cannot always rely on what you see.

So I made a tiny conclusion when I found the answer I've been looking for. Am I still in love with him? Or is this a 140-day crush so LOOOOONNNG overdue to end.

So I tried long and hard to think about it and this is what I've come up with. (Instead of hanging myself, which would be such a waste!)

HOW TO GET OVER A 7 Month Old CRUSH with an Effing Dickhead!

1.) Try to imagine him actually hanging himself!

-I admit, this has nothing to do with anything, It's just so damn funny seeing him trying to figure out how NOT to look ugly whilst doing this. (hahaha)

2.) Find a guy to focus your energy into. Might I add, a guy YOU CANNOT HOOK UP WITH!

-Why? Simple physics really. When you have so much energy for the greatly destructive, you focus it on someone else. Why the unattainable? Because try to remember, it IS just a crush! No need to obssess about it.

3.) Keep busy.

-any heartbreak can be cured by just totally IGNORING IT!!! Burying yourself in your work. I'm not saying forever, just some time till you get that promotion and buy yourself a makeover and THEN flirt.

4.) Plot a seriously SAVAGE REVENGE

-Just tying him to a tree naked, letting ants chew on his f@^*)(@?!!!g face, then letting the girls watch him as his ---- cowers into a corner! Ha!

5.) Cry. And then MOVE ON!

-Easier said than done I know, but still, we can try to figure it out. Piece by piece, day by day, tears eventually dry up. So please keep this in mind... It WILL GET EASIER!!!!!!!!

So there, a very basic 5 step program I am personally following. I hope this works for me, for you and for anybody who has been screwed so hard, we honestly cannot believe that we looked like IDIOTS!!!!

Ciao bella!

goodbye

It's about time to go

It's evening and I have to catch the plane

I waited for you till it was almost dawn

Yet you were not here

You were not here

I called you 3 times on the telephone

No wonder it was switched off, I should have known

I thought we had this conversation

Wait, the kettle is boiling, I have to turn it off

Time for coffee, nerves are taking over me

I waited

To say goodbye to you

Ran my fingers across the bed

That once craddled two

I waited

To kiss you one last time

I wanted to say

I\m sorry, I really did try

Pissed

Not one smile for me the entire day

And yet you wait for someone else, call her, smile at her.

I never treated you badly,

Now I think about it.

Not as much as you treat me.

I just believed there was a good man inside.

Just remember

In your pious ways

WHAT YOU DO TO OTHERS

WILL COME BACK TO YOU TENFOLD.

Its so hard to admit, but I was wrong.

Only one smile would have been enough

Its not only you who's having a shitty day

We are here for each other arent we?

But I suppose not.

Find happiness on your own

Neglect the people who have continually cared and loved you

Have supported you

Given you all they can.

Even if that means forsaking and postponing their own.

You are just not the man I thought you were.

Its nothing much, and will never mean anything in your life.

But I guess time will tell

When you are alone, sad and unable to bear it.

People who only truly love you

AND PEOPLE WHO YOU LET IN YOUR RIGID HEART

are the only ones who can get you

Not only family you need in your life.

You need other perspectives

And just pray that when the time comes

When you realize

Those who truly cared for you

YOU JUST SCREWED

I hope

You will not live to feel the regret of the day

A little excerpt.

About Me:

I am:

-My mother's daughter
:in terms of courage and heart
-My dad's youngest kid
:in terms of childishness and ambition
-My sister's sibling
:in terms of falling in love and being frank
-My brother's sibling
:in terms of a broad mind and a deep understanding of life
-My nephew's and niece's aunt
:in terms of coolness and availability
-My friend's enemies
:in terms of tactics and spiels
-My friend's little big kid
:in terms of naiveness and dreams
-My friend's most cherished person
:in terms of loyalty and commitment
-My boyfriend's worst nightmare
:in terms of harshness and anger
-My boyfriend's angel
:in terms of love and undivided attention
-My shadow's darkness
:in terms of past and present
-My shadow's light
:in terms of the future

I used to:
-swim regularly
-cook everyday
-paint
-read books
-watch movies every weekend
-sleep till my back ached
-work hard
-sing to my heart's content
-dance till my legs hurt
-hug him everyday
-kiss my nephews and nieces
-take my medicine daily
-go to the gym
-be obsessed with shoes
-love Chad Micheal Murray
-be gullible
-dream

Now I:
-still read a LOT of books
-dine out
-sleep so lightly
-work the hardest
-dream the fantastic dreams
-realize that truth neither hurts nor makes a difference
-smile a lot
-speak less
-keep my friends in a tight circle
-keep my secrets
-dont sing and dance anymore
-booze and smoke less frequently
-still obsessed with shoes and bags
-love Gossip Girl
-shut my heart out.

I miss:
-being in my own room
-having peace
-watching tv
-my nephews and nieces
-mocha frap at sm baguio
-tagalog songs
-being hugged everyday
-homecooked meals
-rain
-smell of freshly cut grass
-my dogs
-having a car
-riding a bike
-laughing
-my mom.

I would like to:
-be selfish
-send money regularly
-have peace
-healthy
-fulfill all my and my family's dreams
-rent a nice room here
-get internet connection at home
-walk in the rain
-kiss in public
-see my mom.
-smell my nephews and nieces
-tell mitchell everything will be alright
-tell my sister and brother and grandma i love them so much
-go back to school
-see you
-finish at least one of my novels
-paint again
-write a song
-make you all proud
-fall in love again.
-die peacefully

Who I Want to Meet:

try ko english ha, try lang:
who i want to meet:
-nobody

who i hang out with--
people who are:
-self absorbed, but make a difference in the world
-stuck up nosy sons-of-bitches but care enough to say the truth
-two-timing sluts and whores who know what a compromise means
-sloshed and drugged out people who dont blame anybody of their misfortunes
-freaky life-of the party homos who know when to say no
-unpretentious bastards who love to LOVE life and live it to its fullest, till its time to go to bed
-coffee,cigarette and gossip loving people who know will spend their last centavo on those two things
-PEOPLE WHO DONT PRETEND TO BE VIRTUES-INCARNATE and spend their time minding their own f*#@!ing business instead of pointing at others

UN.

Such and Such

Such were expectations quite a few I had. Beach thing? Sooooo looking forward to it. Spending time, like a whole entire night with you? Uninterrupted? We DO not live in a perfect world such as yesterday.

Such that it was soooo sucky, (except for seeing the fantastic but overly embellished concrete jungle that is JBR (Jumeirah Beach residences, where I might add, a studio alone could cost a minimum of 90,000 AED per annum--almost 1000000 pesos!) well, not that sucky. My fantastic roomies at Villa 45, Room 2 (regards to ate aiza, ginny, liezel and geraldine) for dolling me up with a fantastic short SHORT dress, then meeting my present Indian family to play pool (in 3 1/2 heels, I won) , then heading over to Mr. Yusuf's place (to badger me, joking thing!) then driving around, then picking up Alma and Aileen, JBR thing, finally heading home at (guess?) 5.30am. Seriously sucky though, Yusuf not wanting to go to Fujeirah beach. Making all these things about stuff.... saying basically (I dont want to say!)..... :)

He gave his opinion though, and a flash of boyfriend material came slightly with the breeze. He offered still to take me to FB by bus! So sweet.!

anywho.

The most amazing thing is, he went home and slept here, with me.!

Isn't funny though, when you've got something good, that such and such thigns would arise and will try to send it spiralling down to never neverland.

Waking up after only 2 hours of sleep is a little disorienting. Until you see someone beside you looking so completely gratituous! Anyway...

After all the dramz and shitz that went down, we went to (my second) favorite mall in UAE, the MERCATO. Went to watch (ha!) Watchmen. Such and such we went home, just looking so totally devoid of emotion!

For an explaination of our vague cluelessness check it out here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watchmen_(film)

for an (almost) explaination.

After that, my thing went home, back to the dramz.

Such and such, expectations are sometimes overrated, esp. for me. Sometimes it's better to sit back and just enjoy the moment.

Dating a 5 year old

Nap, food, nap, food. He slobers, stammers, cannot speak properly, he doesnt drink, gets a little unintelligible when he's frustrated, getting sick or simply irritated.

He asks dumb questions, or questions that are impossible to answer (for now). Only thinks of today, what to do today, when he will eat today, what type of candy to buy today.

He has a curfew. Mom calls and he runs towards her. He cannot decide on the type of coffee that he prefers, let alone a restaurant to eat in.

im sleepy, yet I can picture him perfectly.

Cuddled in the sofa, stroking his hair till he falls asleep.

So how is it like dating a 5 year old? same as raising one.

Most of the time, it gets to you, runs you out of the house, kills your hopes, messes with your sanity, and finishes you patience. And yet, it is nothing like when he smiles, cuddles or just says "doodies" =)

It is fantastically excruciatingly painfully delicious.

How do you explain this feeling?

So you came by today...

Honestly,

I was indifferent.

I was ecstatic that you were here

And yet I knew, that even if you weren't

I'd be okay.

I did not use to feel this way

Is it okay?

So you came by today...

We made love

Though that beating in my heart is silently away

The butterflies all just laid.

It was fanastic. It was also okay to be missed.

I cannot help but think that is it normal?

Is this okay?

So you came by today...

We had a fabulous talk.

Discussing things that we relevant and mundane

Still it was painful to jump a bit

Since my heart started acting up

Is it normal?

Is this okay?

What is normal by the way?

That is a conversation for another day.

What I am sure of though is that

I missed you.

Talking to you. You.

Photoshop Tutorials

I know... I know... I'm the last one on earth to learn about photoshop (in terms of photo editing!) but still, people are born every 3 seconds right?

So the first of my researched tutorials will be posted here..and viola! the first one is a simple, idiot proof of changing someone's hair color....

few more are coming... don't cha worry. we'll be pro's in no time!

*thanks to photoshop tutorials and other sites i've come across with... next time, i'll attach the link*

Outside looking in

Think outside the bun.. Taco Bell...

This should probably be my "mantra" for everytime I try to figure out a problem. I remember my college instructors (shoutout! =) always reminding us to "look outside the box"..but as with everything... it is easier said than done.

A perfect example, this new site. Just as I've mastered my http://freakymhykie.blogspot.com haven, I came across my friend's site here in multiply. After much prodding from him, I tried it. Now I have yet to make up my mind on which site to use. Permanently.

My old blog has been with me for 2 years now. Eversince I have discovered that venting out my anger on paper is just as effective when I type it, I have been regularly dissing out my angst-ridden words there. Before, I used notebooks as my swords where I kept tear jerkers, page turners, snooze fests and the like from my life. Sometimes I miss the actual art of writing. (I think I'm going nowhere with this )

This is the first time I'm going to write outside my box.... I'll try it for now and we'll see what happens.

Christmas in Dubai (ofc edition)

Merry Christmas Mama!!!!


Sa smoking area---kaming magkakasama sa opisina



Si joanna at ang former na kinakantiyaw namin sa kanya




ang handa namin. manok. as usual.




Merry Xmas Ulit!

Twilight

What can I say? Such as my literal RUSH to the theater (being a fan of the series WAAAYYY back) and held my breath as the opening credits rolled in...

So?

DISAPPOINTED. That is the only nice term I could think of.

I expected half as much, that the book would be a little "off' in the movie adaptation. But THAT FAR AWAY? Who wrote that $@!*. That's the first thing. Secondly, really, now, do we need THAT MUCH narration throughout the movie? Weird that you are in the "moment", your heart in uneven intervals, then suddenly, "BELLA" or someone else would speak! WTF?

Then, the horrendous editing!!! You all know what I'm talking about...

DOnt want to spoil my mood today.

Basically, Im just hoping and praying that NEW MOON lives up to its hype. Changing the director and writer (?) and perhaps, Vanessa Anne Hudgens (part Filipino) would make a great Leah Clearwater will make NEW MOON far---far better than the disappointment that is twilight.

Also, love your twilight series, Stephanie Meyer, but "THE HOST" sucks.