well how sad it is to love someone you cant have...
no words could ever express how PAINFUL it is.
to let go of someone
because
you know you HAVE to
but DONT want to
but of course
you want to be as gracious about it as possible
even though you want to shout out
na
PU^%&^#$N()*^IN87%
i EARNED my right to fight for you
pero wala namang ganun di ba
because if you love someone
as CLICHE as it may sound
it is best if
you let things flow
and never force anything
because in the end
if its not meant for you today
IT NEVER WAS ANYWAY.

February 03, 2007
in mga pinag iisipan sa araw-araw
so grabe
the end of my new (old na) beginning is about to come to a furious halt. as im with charlize for the past few days, i couldnt help but notice how lonely she feels.... malapit na kaming hindi magkita. her dad is going to come get her tomorrow. so tonight, amidst the freezing (as in 9 deg) cold, we are going out for one last stroll. this goddam motorbike is so freaking close to my heart can't bear not to see her...or her dad....

February 03, 2007
in my day today
happy reunion
let me tell you a secretthat only you can understandill tell it to you first handthings will get sad
i met myselfone lonely autumn's dayfrom my morning walk in a placenot so very far away
i met myself cryingfeeling so damn depressedi asked myself whyand i think you know the rest
i told myself to let it gothat thing that's bothering me soi nod my head in replybut my heart just cant lie
i try so hardeverydaytrying not to miss youbegging the lord aboveto help me forget you
i will tell you this secretthat i can live without youi am so sure i couldand i will prove it to you
now, thoughwhen i see myself from my morning walki keep telling my headthat i can live without youbut i feelthat my heart failsbecause even if i cani dont want to live without you

December 24, 2006
in mga pinag iisipan sa araw-araw
falling away
i bask in the steely morning
of this winter afterglow
drowned during my night's sleep
dreams that come and go
funny thing that dream
trying to catch you
so big you were in it
so little my hands tried to grip
so fast you were running
so tired of just walking
so bright your light was
so dark my surrounding nightlight
i tried so hard to call you
trying every means possible
yet you seem so deaf and distant
my cries never heard that instance
i finally stopped and took a breath
told myself i couldn't do it
told myself i am just a fool
trying to catch
your wind in my chest
i finally watched you walk away
from that dark dark tunnel
realizing that whatever i do
i could never ever catch you.